I have always used words fairly carelessly. I mean, we are just talking, right? I've recently started to be more aware of not only what I am saying, but how I am saying it. Let me explain.
In the past, when I was trying to lose weight (like every other month), I would say that. I want to lose twenty pounds. The problem with losing whatever it is you are wanting to lose whether it be weight, a man, or a negative thought, we inevitably FIND it! To lose means: "to be deprived of; to become unable to find." Well, I don't know about you but I definitely do NOT want to feel deprived of anything and, when I cannot find something it drives me crazy. So, when we say we WANT to lose something, make sure it is something you want to find. I for one, do NOT want to find the weight I lost, the man that was not right for me, or that negative thought that keeps popping in my head. No way.
You might ask why this really matters. Our brain is programed. We have been programed by our environment, our parents, our friends, our jobs, and just about everyone and everything we come across since birth. Those programs, or thoughts and beliefs, are engrained into our subconscious. We don't even know we think or believe them most of the time. When our subconscious brain believes something to be true, we move towards it. It's actually based on science. John Assaraf and his team and colleagues of psychologists and neuroscientists explain this more in his program called NeuroGym. I highly recommend for those who desire change and growth. I'm a lifelong learner personally. Anyhow, when we feel ourselves being pulled in a direction we THINK we do not want or when we look at our life and ask ourselves, "How did I end up here?", it's because of the thoughts and beliefs we have which leads us to speak and act on those beliefs.
Ok, so how do we change this? For me, it was about learning that this was actually a thing. So, awareness is the first step. Next, we need to learn to change those thoughts and beliefs. My first ah ha moment when learning about our thoughts, beliefs, words and ultimately actions, was around my weight. I have been on yo yo diet sinces five-years-old I swear. When I was in high school it was Dexetrim pills over the counter to stop me from eating. After high school it was endless hours in the gym. After kids it was the low fat diet. I could literally eat anything as long as there was no fat content, fun. Next, came the keto diet, the mediterranean diet, HCG shots oh gosh the list goes on. Then one day, I heard someone say, "Why would you want to lose weight only to have to find it?" This is where the word "release" comes in. When we release something, do we find it again? Do we search for it? Do we pick it back up? This is genius! No, no and no! It's not even in our thoughts to pick it back up, right? (Again, our thoughts dictate our actions whether we are aware or not.) Release means "to escape from confinement or set free". Ok, like this is so big to me and maybe its just me but, honestly wouldn't you rather set that man free to never have him be found, picked up or searched for again? Wouldn't you rather set that weight free? Would't you rather set that friendship that no longer serves you free? Man, I know I would. It was like a weight so heavy was lifted immediately off my shoulders (No pun intended). You see, you don't have to lose anything. When you feel ready, you can just say, "I release you because you no longer serve me." (Insert brain explosion emoji here). This is good stuff.
After we are aware and recognize our negative thoughts and/or beliefs and know that we need to change them, we need to act upon them. Using the correct language is part of the key to change I believe. Releasing my weight, friends that no longer serve me and where I am at in my life, food that does not feed my cells, places I no longer wish to live and the list goes on, I must act on that. Taking the first step to release something really is just releasing it verbally. The more you fill yourself with positive words, the more you will change your beliefs, the more you will move towards what you actually desire, the more your life will start to change.
I am on a mission of releasing. I am on a mission to live a masterpiece life. One that is full of passion and purpose and one that I am fully authentic. I am starting to notice my feelings more in different situations. When I am around different people, those that I have had very long term relationships with and the new people I meet, situations that I may feel uncomfortable in or ideas that pop in my head that must be my next project, I notice how I am feeling. Since becoming more aware of my thoughts, beliefs and feelings I can mitigate them before they cause me too much stress. I used to just live in the stress and complain about it (ask my mom, poor thing). Now I am aware, I assess how I am feeling and why I feel that way, and I release what needs to be released. No judgement, no excuses, no guilt. I just release the situation or person to go and be where they are supposed to be, because it's not for me to keep them from their path either. It's a newfound freedom I just had to share.
I am not perfect. I am not aware one hundred percent of the time. But, if it goes on too long, my level of awareness is such that it eventually comes to the forefront of my brain, out of the subconscious and I can deal with it. I can release it. I hope you are not hanging on to things, people, situations that are causing you stress, anxiety and ultimately a lack of wholeness. If you are, I invite you to release them. In a loving, kind, compassionate way. Just release them to be where and who they need to be. It really is the highest level of love for yourself and others. Peace to all and, to all a good night.