In 2020, we moved seven hours away from the home we built and raised the kids in after they left for college. It was not only the right time, it was a financial decision we knew would help us live the life we desired. Less debt, more time together and more time to do the things we each desired. My husband loves to work. He works with his hands by building homes, rebuilding cars and fixing everything with a motor. He retired and can now work when and how he wants. After being a union worker for almost 50 years it is his time to shine.
I wanted out of my health care career as a Speech-Language Pathologist. I went to school in my late 30's focused on the almighty dollar. I had a goal. I met my goal and I used that high paying career to push us out of debt. I always knew selling the house was on the table. My husband not so much. I also knew in my heart I would not always be a speech therapist. It was a stepping stone that I am so grateful for. An education that will last a lifetime.
One thing I tend to do and did not know was a "thing", was contrive an exit plan. What is an exit plan? It's a plan you make when you start something new, be it a new home, a new business, a new adventure that allows you to leave that plan when it's time. I remember when I was opening a business with a partner. When we formed the LLC, the lawyer asked what the buyout would be should anyone choose to leave. It wasn't something I had considered. I had never really thought of the "ending" for that story. Had I planned for it, later down the line it could have caused a lot less heartache. Again, planning doesn't mean perfection. It can still look and feel sloppy, but I firmly believe planning starts the thinking process for change.
Before Covid (isn't that how we all negate time now, before and after covid?) I thought I may pursue a business in diagnostic procedures for the medical side of being a speech therapist. I spoke with a financial advisor and he advised I have an exit plan. I was ecstatic! My husband thought I was nuts. I was thinking of how I would sell or end the business I hadn't even started? Yes! It is how I have always thought. I am a planner and I love starting new ventures, only to move on once they are up and running and successful. It's how my brain works.
We are currently building our third home together. I mention, very nonchalantly to my husband when we discuss designs and such, that this may or may not be good for resale. I tread lightly. He's working his tail off on this house and I'm afraid he would fall off the deep end if he thought I wanted to sell it. I don't, not right now, One day though, we may sell it. I feel comfort in knowing we have an exit plan. Planning doesn't always turn out the way you think, but just having a plan prepares you for what may come. I think it's a heart string that when tugged often enough, prepares you for what may come and keeps you open to new possibilities.
I used to think that things just happened. That I didn't have control over my destiny. I now know I have a lot of control and what I can't control, I now refocus my attention on the direction I want to go. I can be ok with anything that comes my way, because my exit plan allows me to think outside the box. It allows me to plan and imagine my life, any changes and my future exactly as I desire it. It opens my heart to possibilities
and even new ideas I cannot even imagine.
After living a childhood of fear, abuse and feeling like I did not matter, this exit plan was always on my mind. Even when I did not know it. I dreamt of a day I would escape. I dreamt of a day I would live in complete freedom. Even in the abuse and dysfunction I knew there was a way out. Now, today, I use that past experience for good. I use it to propel my life in the direction I desire. I challenge you to contrive an exit plan. Are you stuck in a job you hate? Are you stuck in a loveless marriage? Have you grown out of your friendships and desire people around you that will lift you up and challenge you to do and be better? Well, what's your exit plan? Sit with your self and ask yourself these questions. It's there, you just need to slow down to hear it. If you have heard it, then you know in your heart what to do. You only live once. Contrive your exit plan and go for it! I got your back.